Bit and Opinions of my "in the process" Book?

Today I thought I would  post some bits of my books for you all! 

Now I would like ya'll to give me your honest opinions of what you think of these bits. Do you think they need work?  Or make you (REALLY) want to read more? What do you think I could change them? How could I make them more effective?

Note: I've not edited yet so bare with me;-)

So here goes;-)

...Amber cheerfully tapped on her sisters door before opening it and stepping in, she bounced over Amy's bed and jumped on it. Amy was standing on a chair pinning up a Police Poster.

 Amber cocked her head and stated more than asked. "Another Cop poster?!" She glanced around Amy's room... The walls were white, but It was a wonder you could see the color of them, cop poster were hung up on everywhere... Cops posters from movies and real life... Name it and Amy had it.

 Amy looked down at Amber from her chair, she grinned and jumped straight from the chair onto the bed. "Yup! It's from a new show I like!" Amy brought her knees up, resting her chin on them.

 Amber chucked. "You SO want to be a cop!"

 Amy straightened and tightened her arms around her legs. "I do not!" She declared. "It's a fascination of mine, nothing more."

 Amber laughed. "No one can be that fascinated with something." Amber finished with a wink.

 Amy shook her head. "I REALLY don't want to be a cop, I'd never make it, I'm weak, and I can't even do pushups!" Amy smiled. "Really it's just a admiration of mine... Being a cop is not for me."

 Amber reached forward, taking Amy's hand gently. "Just remember a dream that might seem impossible can be possible with God! If you don't want to be a cop, well, that's fine, but if you do, don't let anything stop you, with God you can DREAM BIG. Trust Him Amy and you can walk on water and won't sink..."

....Her fingers shook as she dialed 911

" It's my daughter, I can't get a hold of her,  she was supposed to be hear hours ago. Her friends say she never came back to her room, and I've called her college, she isn't there..."

"God help her, I can't live without her!!!! She's my life!!"

 She flinched as she was thrown into a dark room, she waited a moment to let her head clear, before setting up. After a few minutes she sat up, her head vision was blurred, and the room spun... After closing her eyes, her vision was cleared a little... The faces of many girls around the room came into a fuzzy view, most were pale, their eyes were dark, many lay groaning and crying. Amber blinked. Where am I? What am I doing here? Who brought me here?

 She continued to look around the room. She glance directly in front of her,  Amber's eyes locked with a blonde girl that was staring at her with dark eyes. Amber swallowed hard.

 The girl, without emotion, said. "Welcome to hell."

 "Why aren't you finding my daughter?!" She screamed at the detective.

 Amber screamed in pain as he slapped her...

 "God help my daughter!" He prayed.

 A tear slid down at her cheek as the man looked down at her on the bed.

"God please help my daughter!" She sobbed.

 Amber was numbed, she couldn't feel... her life was truly hell.

 "We believe she might have been taken for sex trafficking..." She looked at her husband with horror at the detective's cold words.

 Amber new it was close to the end... The pain was too much... She hurt... She couldn't make it.  Amy's face popped in her mind.

 "God what are we gonna do, I can't live without my daughter??!!" She prayed through tears.

 The girls watched as he dragged lifeless Amber out of the room, slamming the door in their faces.

 "God please bring my babe back to me!"

 The girls scrambled to one corner as the police shouted orders and handcuffed the traffickers.

 "Your daughter is believed to be dead..."

She broke into sobs as she leaned against her sobbing husband...

 She slid down the wall to the floor in the corner of her room... "GOD!!!!!!" She shouted at the top of her lungs. "HOW CAN I MAKE IT WITHOUT MY SISTER?????????"

Hey Amy,

 ...I know that I've not been there for you as much lately. College life is very crazy! Don't worry you'll find just HOW crazy in four years!

 Amy, I feel like God wants me to write you in my own writing and just tell you some things that are on my heart.

 I've know I've told you a MILLION times that I know you wanted to be a cop, and every time you deny it. But Amy I DO KNOW that being a cop is what God has in store for you. I see the passion that burns in your heart to protect the innocent. The see the fire flame brighter when anything with cops are mentioned.

 Amy you have so many insecurities, you're afraid to step out and do what God wants you to do because you feel like you're not capable of it. You feel like you would coward from the task of being a cop.  But Amy I see the boldness and courage of a lion in you. People may not see the boldness that's in your heart but deep down its there and if they search they'll find it. You may not look like a Lion on the outside but it's on the inside that counts.

 Amy if you just draw strength from God and put your trust in Him, I know you'll make the BEST cop out there! You'll fight and you'll have a big part in stopping crime in New York, City.

 I feel like if you'll just swallow those insecurities that you'll be able to soar!!

 I know it'll be hard Amy, I know you think your weak,  but you ARE NOT!!!! You are strong and you are capable of DOING THIS!!!!!!

 So go for it Amy, be who God wants you to be!!!! Fight hard and you'll overcome all the odds,  all your insecurities!!!!

Luv you always sister!!!

 ~Amber~

... "YES!!!" Amy screamed to the top of her lungs, jumping up off the coach and grabbing a vase off the  glass coffee table and throwing it across the room. It hit the wall and shattered. Amy breathed deep as sunk to the floor on her knees, her voice sound weak in her own ears. "Yes, I want to be a cop and God wants me to me a cop. Amy looked up at the ceiling. "God I've spent twenty-two years running from You. Running from Your call." Amy chuckled in surrender. "But I'm sure worn out from it." Amy smiled. "Yeah, I'm weak, but if You called me to a cop, I must have given me and inner strength." Amy placed both hands on her heart and said the words she dreaded but longed to say her whole life, "God I'll be a cop. I'll follow your will, no matter the cost..."

  ..."Aren't you even coming back home for the weekend this time?" Kim asked over the phone. Amy lay on her bed. Exhausted. This was her fourth week at Academy, she had made it this far, she had to make it the rest of the way. If she went home she knew she wouldn't have the gumption to come back.

 "I'm afraid not Kim, I just can't." Amy could hear Kim's angry sigh.

 "Just give it up, Amy. You aren't cut out for this."

 Amy closed her eyes.  Quitting sounded like a good idea.

 Amy sighed deeply. She had to fulfill the call, she couldn't fun anymore.

 "I'm sticking it out, Kim."

 Weeks turned into months as Amy pressed on towards her goal of becoming a NYPD police officers. Every day she thought about quitting and every day God gave her strength to go on.

 On her fifteen week at her Academy, Amy walked into her dorm to find Tris packing her things.

 Amy frowned as she took a step forward. "Tris?"

 Tris stopped and turned around. "I can't do this crap, I just can't."

 Amy starred in disbelief. Not in a million years would she had though Tris to quite. Amy couldn't imagine how she was still staying here when Tris had given up. It was truly her God.

 And He would help her to make it the rest of the way.

 ...Amy knew all and all she had fought against tremendous odds. Number one, her fear. That was something she had battled with everyday. She knew her fear wasn't yet gone, for she would truly know fear once she was on those streets. But she had overcome some of her insecurities. Actually admitting that being a cop was what God wanted of her was a big step in that direction. And overcoming the loneliness and pain of the Academy was another huge step. During those long months of consent work, she had truly felt alone, save Jesus being with her. Her parents and Kim had made every effort to get her to give up on her dream. Trying to convince her and believing it theirselves that this was not her calling. That she was chasing a fantasy. She had not support. None but Jesus.

 Amy felt more than honored that He believed in her even when she would not believe in herself. That He had used Amber to be the source that would push her into doing what He had called her to do.

 Amy smiled to herself. If Amber had been at her graduation today she would have cheered, instead of looking remaining silent, she would have lit up the building with her smile, instead of looking solemn. She would have been proud and believed in her, instead of being ashamed and doubting her.

 Amy felt a bit sorry for herself in that moment. When Amber had been kidnapped she had truly lost everything. A friend, a supporter, an encourager, and believer. Amy felt deprived for a second. She had not a soul on this earth that believed in this dream.

 Amy stood from the couch and walked over to the window. She city light glowed into the room. Amy looked up to the sky, some might not say you could see the stars with all the lights. But Amy could see them. She could feel their beauty and light gleaming down on her face. All evidence that Jesus cared for her and not matter how alone and afraid she felt, He was there. Holding her hand. More than the gun that was on her side, Jesus was keeping her safe.

 Amy smiled at the reassurance in her heart. She felt such emotion as she looked up at the bright sky. God had surely brought her a long way. God was making her hidden dream come out and come true. God was surely molding something beautiful out of her crazy mess.

 Amy closed her eyes, the stars still her closed vision. "Jesus, thank you for bring me this far, and I know Your taking me to heights I never dreamed I would go. Thank You for helping start to believe in myself. And"..., Amy swallowed, "Thank you for giving me a sister that believed in me and beckoned me to do Your will. Her voice was husky as she said. "Thank You." Amy opened her eyes as she finished. "And God please tell Amber I'm walking on water and I'm trying not to sink..."

Amy felt the passion burning in her eyes as she bodily said. "I'm here because I love this city, I'm here because my heart does beat for the NYPD. I'm not here because I'm think capable, I'm here because somehow God saw me capable. I only hope I can live out to what he would have me do."

So come one, let's have some comments??!!!

Excited to hear what you think;-)

God Bless!

#UNASHAMED